I treasure the time I dont spend with you. I thought you were the monster under my bed. Enter the fray and enjoy the spirit of the confrontation instead of fearing it or downplaying it. 75. 84. I only yawn when I'm super fascinated. A friend had been pulled over for speeding in Malibu and the cop told him "Go back to Mexico." I'm a Chumash! Youre cute. But if you get yourself familiar with some classic comeback statements, youd be able to flaunt confidence whenever such hurtful words are said to you. You almost reached a level of coherency resembling my newborn son. 38. You just live. Whatever is eating at you must be suffering horribly. Youve got something on your face. We also use third-party cookies that help us analyze and understand how you use this website. It's hard to come up with a good roast right on the spot when you're in a confrontation. 13. Ever feel like you don't know what to say to challenging people? Youre my favorite person besides every other person Ive ever met. Guy: I can see forever in your eyes.Girl: But all I can see is never in yours. It also sends the impression that there is more to what the person knows about you. You suck. Silence is always the answer youll give. It is a 5head.". Jesus might love you, but everyone else definitely thinks youre an idiot. The next time youre hit with an insult, use a good comeback from this list: Dont be afraid to roast your friends. His passion for writing brought him to the Savannah College of Art and Design, where he studied writing. Hey, your village called they want their idiot back. You have your entire life to be a jerk. Somewhere out there, there's a tree working very hard to produce oxygen so that you can breathe. Again, you can make the remark more about them and less about you by turning the table. People like you are the reason God doesnt talk to us anymore. Oops! I could've sworn I was dealing with an adult. By this, compare your situation to theirs and make theirs look grave. Youre about as useful as an ashtray on a motorcycle. I'm the person you should have treated with respect. If genius skips a generation, your children will be brilliant. But Ill keep trying. Thats a checkmate there. Your brain is working overtime today. I noticed the improvement immediately. You are so dishonest that I cant even be sure that what you tell me are lies! You are so dumb, you need a cue card to say Huh? You are so dumb, you need instructions on how to use a rocking chair. You are so dumb, you planted a dogwood tree and expected a litter of puppies. You are so dumb, you play solitaire for cash. You are so old, if you to acted your age, youd die. At least I have an excuse, your just an a*shole. Im pushing this conversation to my daily trash bin, 24. I always yawn when Im interested. Ordinarily people live and learn. 13. Youre like the end pieces of a loaf of bread. I hope you meet someone who is good-looking, intelligent, and cultured. I thought of you today. Theyll find this collection of roasts hilarious! Dont you get tired of putting makeup on your two faces every morning? People like you are the reason God doesnt talk to us anymore. No matter where you go, people, have a way of getting into your head by hurling out savage insults or mean remarks. I envy people who have never met you. I want you to leave. Smart and witty comebacks for someone says "make me" If you ask a person to shut up, or do something, and he/she responds with "make me" in a rude way, then you'll need some smart and witty comebacks. I think you've confused me with someone who cares. Aww, dont worry, you are wantedwanted for several accounts of perjury. 5. Did I hurt your ego? Thanks to all authors for creating a page that has been read 265,636 times. Your kid is so annoying, he makes his Happy Meal cry. Good Comebacks in an Argument 1. Being a dick to me wont make yours bigger. No, the 3rd one down. Id finally get some peace and quiet. You need a kiss on the neck from a crocodile. Ill never forget the first time we met. Whats your number?Girl: Its in the phone book. If your brain was dynamite, there wouldnt be enough to blow your hat off. Here are some great responses for when someone tells you to get a life: Maybe I'll take yours. That being said, allow me to redirect you to the discount section. Go right in. When you go to the mind reader, do you get half price? When you pass away and people ask me what the cause of your death was, Ill say it was your stupidity. When you talk, other people get hoarse just listening. Why dont you go to the library and brush up on your ignorance? Why dont you slip into something more comfortable like a coma. You look like something that came out of a slow cooker. Youre the reason the divorce rate is so high. But then, whats my own humble opinion against thousands of others?I hear that when your mother first saw you, she decided to leave you on the front steps of a police station while she turned herself in. 44. This website uses cookies to improve your experience. I didnt think it was possible to give me more reasons to hate you until today. I was going to make a joke about your life, but I see life beat me to the punch. You wouldnt want to go around with people that keep telling you that you have no friends because of your attitude. It looks pathetic and it shows that you're immature. 90 Good Comebacks, Roasts & One-Liners For When You Need A Sick Burn, These 6 Personality Types Always Need To Have The Last Word And Win Every Argument, 30 Perfect Comebacks To Use When Someone Calls You Fat, 25 Of The Best Comebacks & One-Liners From The Office, 75 Best Sassy Savage Quotes For When You're In A Mood, 27 Passive-Aggressive Quotes That Are Actually Pretty Inspiring, 99 Best New Years Instagram Captions To Welcome 2023 With Style, 90 Happy New Year's Quotes To Ring In An Amazing 2023, 30 Funny New Year Memes To Ring In 2023 With A Laugh, 111 Ways To Say "F*ck You" While Keeping It Classy, William Shakespeare, "All's Well That Ends Well", 10 Ways Universe Warns You When Your Life Is About To Change, 100 Best Love Quotes That'll Make Anyone Believe In Love, 30 Funny Quotes For Best Friends To Use As Instagram Captions. It takes me a lot of effort to smile when youre around. Even if it is true, this is just an easy way of remarking less about you. Someday you'll go far. my brain fits my forehead, unlike you i have a bigger one c: My forehead IS big But your ego is bigger! Row, row, row your boat gently down a raging fucking waterfall. Were you born on the highway? A rejection letter from MENSA wouldnt be too much of a surprise for you now, would it? A sharp tongue does not mean you have a keen mind. All day I thought of you I was at the zoo. Anyone who told you to be yourself couldnt have given you worse advice. Are you always this stupid or are you making a special effort today? Are you always an idiot, or just when Im around? Are your parents siblings? As an outsider, what do you think of the human race? Good job. I must have been imagining things. All mistakes are fixable, yet you arent. Being told that you look young is usually a positive thing, and many women welcome the compliment. Allow me to be the first one. If you need a perfect comeback, there are plenty of funny ones below! I'm the person you wish you were. You keep thinking to yourself, "Why didn't I say that!?" They might have just said that out of bitterness, hoping youd feel bad about yourself. Im not going to repeat myself, but Im also glad to do anything that prevents you from talking. And the best part? I have a big forehead, you are immature, nobody is perfect. You're as sharp as a rubber ball. They say our brains don't stop developing until we reach 25; looks like yours stopped a bit early. You should really come with a warning label. No I do, you are just not one of them. How many languages? And I really hope you stay there. Dont be ashamed of who you are. Don't feel bad if you have a big forehead. When you can establish with your response that you are not craving low-level friendships like the person in the name of being social, you will be seen as an independent and confident individual. Swallow your pride and your tongue while youre at it. Im trying to imagine you with personality. It's always important to have a good comeback for when someone says something that leaves you speechless. 4. Dont end there. % of people told us that this article helped them. How did you get here? Good Comebacks 1. Guy: So, how do you like your eggs in the morning?Girl: Unfertilized. 50+ Snappy Comebacks for Bullies. Bro you lookin at my dick thats hella weird. Ylwppl 9 mo. I am returning your nose. So, you will see in this article a wide range of phrases that you can keep in your back pocket to serve as a snappy comeback to when someone says to you 'did I ask?" . PersonOnReddit786 9 mo. Yes, I talk like an Idiot. January graduated with an English and Literature degree from Columbia University. Well, there is scientific evidence to prove that people with bigger heads are more intelligent. Especially when the other person is acting immature. You owe that tree an apology 3. Hey, you have something on your chin. We'll assume you're ok with this, but you can opt-out if you wish. Unless your name is Google, stop acting like you know everything! A glowstick has a brighter future than you. A good roast in response to someone telling you that you have no life could be something along the lines of: Well, at least I have a life more interesting than yours which consists of sitting around all day and doing nothing. Make a mental list of comebacks for different subjects. You better take care of it, dear. Don't dish out what you can't take in return. Amaranthine_rue 2 yr. ago. You are so full of shit, the toilets jealous. I think you should go and apologize to it. Youre the reason God created the middle finger. I could eat a bowl of alphabet soup and poop out a smarter statement than whatever you just said. 71. If you were an inanimate object, youd be a participation trophy. Take a look at these awesome comebacks for bullies! Funny, I dont remember you raising your hand. Thankfully, here are 30 different things to say when someone tells you that you dont have any friends. Use it to try out great new products and services nationwide without paying full pricewine, food delivery, clothing and more. OK, maybe a little harsh. You see that door? Girl: Darling, do you think Ill lose my looks as I get older?Guy: With luck, yes. 5. Its people like you that make it so easy to be picky about who I hang around with, 23. You see that door? Id give you a nasty look but youve already got one. Wish I had a flip phone so I could slam it shut on this conversation. Additionally, he loves to write zany fiction stories and take care of his pet frog. I could eat a bowl of alphabet soup and poop out a smarter statement than whatever you just said. I do, only you would not know them because they would not associate with someone like you. I am returning your nose. Im not insulting you, Im describing you. I hope you meet someone who is good-looking, intelligent, and cultured. 5. 50. Friend: Yeah, let's keep it that way Dont be ashamed of who you are. Are you ready to hop in that garbage can? I will ignore you so hard you will start doubting your existence. So use them with vengeance against any mean person. I never even listen when you tell me them. 85. If ignorance is bliss, you must be the happiest person on the planet. We hope you enjoy this website. Do your parents even realize theyre living proof that two wrongs dont make a right? Watch popular content from the following creators: Comebacks . Guy: Your Ugly.Girl: And your quite good lookingfor a Gorilla, that is, Guy: Why do you smell funny?Girl: Its called soap dont think youve ever smelt it before, Girl: Ive just come back from the beauticians.Guy: Pity it was closed. The only fault about this comeback is that it can reflect that you are angry and vulnerable when reminded of your reality. 30 Comebacks When Someone Calls You A Cry Baby by Admin We know that when one is called a crybaby; it is because they exhibit traits relatable to babies, which includes crying often. Please continue while I take notes. I cant think of anything to celebrate on your birthday except you being closer to death. 95. Youre my favorite person besides every other person Ive ever met. This article has been viewed 265,636 times. So it is forgivable that they assume wrongly. Only a socially-awkward jackass would make a comment like that. Youre lucky intelligence isnt measured in negative numbers. Like a comeback if someone calls you fat, make one up, then keep it in your mind. She writes about astrology, games, love, relationships, and entertainment. 7. I found it in my business. I told him not to act like a fool. I researched your entire family tree and it seems you were the sap. I think Mother Nature really hates you because you remind her so much of all her mistakes! wikiHow is a wiki, similar to Wikipedia, which means that many of our articles are co-written by multiple authors. 97. However, if the statement is coming from your peers like classmates, club members, or people outside your family, then the possibility that they are saying it to make you feel like you are missing out is high. Spending some time would imply Id spend anything on your ungrateful ass. Like a comeback if someone calls you fat, make one up, then keep it in your mind. 5. Oops! 27. On this note, some have made it a habit because of its relieving effect. 5. You can respond with "I would most likely go to hell, but with you here, I'm already there.". You're the reason God created the middle finger. Check out what Tyra has to say. ago. 17. 3. By then, you will see other ways to make the issue about them and not you. 69. 56. Guy: Hey cutie, how bout you and I hitting the hot spots?Girl: Sorry, I dont date outside my species. Remember when I asked for your opinion? Before you came along we were hungry. Good story, but in what chapter do you shut up? I say that you are not perfect, but you are doing alright. So, a thought crossed your mind? Get well soon. Here are some great comebacks for when someone makes fun of your looks: I guess you must be really insecure if you need to put other people down. That's a plus for me because I don't get to deal with people like you. Absence makes the heart remember, apparently. Here are some good comebacks to use the next time someone insults you: Here are some good comebacks. If genius skips a generation, your children will be brilliant. When they said grow a pair, they didnt mean for you to have kids. Dont blame me for your stupidity. But here's hoping. 8. I created this site to help people with verbal self-defense and to find the right words in difficult situations Read more. 18. You need a kiss on the neck from a crocodile. What did you do with the diaper? If you ever cross my mind, Ill make sure its a busy intersection. "Get a life LOL" "Like yours? What is a good comeback when someone told me to die in a fire? It's a game changerget it free for a limited time! This article has been viewed 265,636 times. The truth will set you free. {"smallUrl":"https:\/\/www.wikihow.com\/images\/thumb\/1\/1e\/Make-a-Clean-Comeback-Step-1-Version-2.jpg\/v4-460px-Make-a-Clean-Comeback-Step-1-Version-2.jpg","bigUrl":"\/images\/thumb\/1\/1e\/Make-a-Clean-Comeback-Step-1-Version-2.jpg\/aid132194-v4-728px-Make-a-Clean-Comeback-Step-1-Version-2.jpg","smallWidth":460,"smallHeight":345,"bigWidth":728,"bigHeight":546,"licensing":"